“
it’s like they’ve never been away
”
“
it’s like they’ve never been away
”
A real friend is a strange thing to define. I’m sure that you, like me, have had many different friends throughout your time on this planet. You pick them up all over the place; at school, at university, at work, on holiday. The thing is you seem to drop them and move on just as easily. Not in a malicious sense, it’s just that as time passes people go in their separate ways. You move to another town, another job, another country and you slowly but surely begin to lose touch with them.
Those people are still your friends. They’re just no longer close to you on a regular basis. But then, being around someone often doesn’t mean that you’re particularly closer to them than others does it? Like I said, it’s a strange thing to define. But it is easy to figure out when you’ve got a real friend.
Often you’ll discover your real friends when you have a reunion. It may be a school reunion, it may be a work reunion, a family reunion or whatever, but there’s a strange thing that happens to friends after a period apart from each other.
Sometimes you’ll meet up with some old friends and first there’s the initial joy and happiness at seeing everybody once again and laughing at how much fatter everyone has become. Then you do the quick catch up. “You split up? Oh I’m so sorry.” “You’re living in Wimbledon now? Oh nice.” “San Francisco you say, I’ve visited there once.” “No we’ve just bought a house. Double glazing and everything. Skint now.” You know the type of thing. Then something strange happens. After a short while every conversation suddenly seems to begin with, “Do you remember when…..?”
When that happens the mood changes. You’ll laugh and cry at some of the memories and anecdotes, but after a while you’ll get this sad feeling and realize that, no matter how much you love these people, you’ve moved on. Your friendship changed after the day you left and although it’s nobody’s fault, it’s all a distant memory now. You’ll arrange to meet up again, you may even send each other Birthday and Christmas cards and you’ll still remain friends but that closeness has gone. It’s not a bad thing, it’s just a fact of life and I’m sure you’ve all been through it.
Meeting up with a real friend is completely different. The wonderful thing about real friends is that, even if you haven’t laid eyes on each other in years, you still get on like a house on fire. You just say hello and then it just clicks back into place and it’s like you only saw each other yesterday. You don’t need to catch up, you just start talking the same shit you did last time you spoke. It’s a great feeling to be out with your real friends. You don’t need to pretend. You don’t need to try and remember things to keep the conversation going and if you do have a “Remember when?” conversation then chances are it will simply be to add some added colour to the current conversation.
Real friends are hard to find and should be cherished. They’re real friends because they care and because the distance between you doesn’t make a blind bit of difference. They’ll always have time for you, if ever you’re around. The most important thing is – that’s enough.
The Lemonheads are like real friends. Listening to this album, it’s like they’ve never been away. I can’t think of a better compliment than that. If you buy one album this month, buy this. If you buy two, buy this again and give it to a real friend. They’ll love you for it.
Words: Damian Leslie